"Back in the Day, You Cost 300 Dollars, But Now Your Giving It To Him For Free" - Tamera Mowry

Please watch this video in which actor Tamera Mowry discusses her struggles with receiving criticism due to her interracial marriage. This video moved me, because I've experienced a lot of hate, and will experience more. It disgusts me, racism, some of the shit haters say is atrocious. But Tamera knows that her love is real. I wish we all could realize that half of the things that divide us really don't matter. DO YOU! If you are gay, transgender, Black, White, Chicano, Asian, Purple, pink.....just live your life.

Where Are You?

 

"Peek-a-boo"

Hola readers! Wanted to do something, a little check in of sorts. A break from the album reviews I've been serving. :) 

Have you ever been so busy and wrapped up in life that you feel like it's all a blue? You feel like it's passing you by yet you can't stop it. 

This morning I literally googled "how to stay calm" and found a plethora of leads that aid with calmness. 

One thing I literally did was look at my bedroom wall and repeat to myself "I am Calm, I am Happy, I am Focused, I will Succeed" 

Sometimes you have to literally speak to YOURSELF to get it together. I said it about 3 times repeatedly and felt a little better. 

I often have to remember WHERE I AM. And ask myself... Are you enjoying the ride? Did you complete that goal? If not, why don't you do it? 

So for those anxious nerve wrecked bee's out there, it's all gonna fall together. We don't know how, I don't know how, but sit tight and do what you can. 

Hugs, wishes, and kisses.  

The Weight

The Weight of It all 

As I sit and reflect on what has occurred  within the last two months, I can't help but feel worn out. What hurts is the fact that there is nothing that I can do for Trayvon Martin and the 17 year old Jamaican Boy. It's frustrating. Both of them are not getting the justice they deserve. 

I feel the weight if it on my back, on my heart. It's heavy. 

We care, and we know what happened. We know it wasn't right and that innocent lives were taken away. 

A lillte ole me is simply putting this out there in hopes that someone will take something away from the acknowledgment. 

They are me and are a part of me. 

Hugs, kisses, and wishes. 

"B. Scott - Mother Muffin Snubbed by the BET Awards"

"Look, we all know its a political world and things work a certain way, but in entertainment you would think that one could fully express themselves without any barriers."

So I must do this for the record. For the community. For all Black LGBT people who are constantly silenced by the white community and  black community. B Scott, a famous YouTube sensation that has expanded his career into the likes of E Entertainment, Bravo, The Tyra Banks Show, Mariah Carey, Jamie Fox & Sirius Radio, and Ebony Magazine; is definitely one of LGBT's finest.

The BET Awards snubbed B. Scott, telling him to switch out of his heels during the BET pre- show. Now first of all you know B. Scott looked fabulous, hair laid and face BEAT FOR THE HEAVENS, GALAXIES, and GODS.It saddens me because B.Scott didn't even look like himself. As a true love muffin  I'm sure other love muffins feel me, B. Scott DID NOT LOOK HAPPY. He didn't look like himself. He seemed distraught, as if he was trying to hold it in and I know it burned his spirit on the inside. I honestly thought BET supported him FULLY. 
So lets think critically about this. Why was he snubbed BET? Is it because he challenges what the black community constantly neglects? Is it because he is fabulous and looks better than have of the females? Is it because HE IS LIVING IN HIS TRUTH!? Y'all got the game twisted. How are you going to hire someone and then change them!? It's ENTERTAINMENT, not corporate America.


We're you afraid that B. Scott would send the wrong message to viewers? Y'all need to check his plate boo! His viewers are DIVERSE! If anything he would've helped your brand. He would have helped strengthen your BRAND! Your trying to do better BET and I see it, but this was not right. It's disrespectful. You allow people to have their breast hang out and WEAR NO CLOTHING then you want to ask him to tune it down? Don't be hypocritical! Don't even go there! 


People on stage twerking and acting a fool. It reminds me of church or something. I completely understand the predicament that B. Scott was in. I've been in numerous situations where someone asked me to tone it down, and I couldn't say much nor did I have anyone to help me fight. 


So B. Scott, honey you have a community of people like ourselves, black feminine gay men, black women, and an array of others who KNOW what happened to you and will blast BET for it.

I personally commend you for handling it like a trooper. Been a fan if you since I was 16 years old!!! You are truly a blessing to the world. So please know that this situation with BET was a door that you opened. That means that you are doing what your supposed to do! So we see it and all that you've accomplished! Keep going girl! This is your purpose lovely, I know you know that the spirit is always with you and is using you to communicate some issues that society neglects all the time.

And for ya'll haters out there who are stating that B. Scott is being ungrateful, please have several seats and get it together real quick. He is very humble and knows where he came from. How would you feel if you went somewhere to work and they asked you to turn off who you are? They told you your tie was a bit much for them or you need to change your outfit? Wouldn't you feel disrespected and unappreciated? When someone asks you to do a job for them, they obviously see something in you. 

Instead of muffling people, they need to be focused on expression. You can have everything else on your network, EVERYTHING else yet you can't let the LGBT be themselves. That's the issue, we always encourage LGBT people in our community to tone it down and muffle it. PEOPLE ALREADY KNOW! They know the B. Scott brand! 

My heart is in support of the one and only  B. Scott!

Please share your comments and thoughts. Hugs, wishes, and kisses! 

Pull Up to the Bumper Baby: Eye Contact

"Now in the parking lot garage,
You'll find the proper place,
Just follow all the written rules,
You'll fit into the space." Grace Jones/Nightclubbing/Pull up to the Bumper - 1981

Hola Chicas! So we are gonna sit down and discuss the tea of eye contact while flirting. If you didn't know now you know! Someone told me "I'm not gonna talk or flirt with you if your not looking at me." So of course peeps, you need to LOOK at whoever is talking a good game to you.

You could be looking into the eyes of your future husband and baby's father or future wife/baby's mother! Do you want to miss out on that? *cues crickets* - I didn't think so.


Eye contact is essential to flirting because the eyes say alot about a person. It allows you to read or to be read, if you know what I mean. You can gain a better sense of someone's energy towards you if you study there eyes. You can see if they want your time or not, its completely silent acknowledgement. Non-Verbal communication ignites the real communication.

It can get tricky if someone who is attractive that you have been staring at looks at you one time, simply because they caught you staring.
Lets say you walk into a room, a social gathering per say and you see a dime piece (male or female) giving you that eye! It happens all the time! You give them that eye back, thats you silently saying "kick your game." Unfortunately, some people (like myself) look else where or at the ground and are completely oblivious to the no verbal communication people of interest send us. 

So we have to use our eyes and learn how to read them if we want to master this world of flirting. There are some people who just naturally do it all the time. They walk into a room and just oozzeeee flirtation! And then some of us, like me yes I admit, are completely whack at it! So

My friend once told me - " you are going to miss out on your Hubbie because you never look at people!!!" And I don't want that!

So there you go sugar plums! Eye contact is one of the MAIN pieces of flirtation! So use it!!! 

Pull Up to the Bumper Baby : Small Talk

"Driving down those city streets,
Waiting to get down, 
Won't you get your big machine,     
Somewhere in this town?
Pull up to my bumper baby, 
In your long black limosine, 
Pull up to my bumper baby, 
And drive it in between."  - Grace Jones, Pull Up to the Bumper, Nightclubbing (1981)

What ya'll know about that Grace Jones? She is FIERCE!!!! 


Ladies and Gents.....if you need some tips on your game let me school you! Can I give it a shot? Why Not?

First and foremost, I have no game!!! My player card has never been activated and that's fine! Lol but I'll share some tips that I've learned and am mastering, also friends have taught me these things that have worked!  

So you want to get you a boo? A future husband / wife? A jump off? Ok I'll stop LOL! Back to the game of flirting. 

Ladies:
Truth be told, ladies actually hold the power. Many think that men pursue just to pursue but that's not really the case. A lady must give the man the GO in order for him to approach her. Now of course this doesn't always happen because there are some thirsty thirst bucket men out there! But, a woman usually gives the guy the green light. She does so by:

1. Eye contact with the admirer

2. Smiling

3. Playing with her hair while he stares

4. Fixing clothing

5. Applying make up/cosmetics as the admirer gawks at her

6. laughs

7. Catch your admirer watching you by briefly looking at him/her and looking away as if you didn't notice him/her. (If your with your girls or boys, act as if you are fully invested in your convo with them all the while your utilizing their energy to make your admirer want you - wqant you to give them your attention even more!)

8. Being Coy - The art of being clever, shy and lady like. Here is the technical definition.

adjective \ˈkȯi\  

1. a : shrinking from contact or familiarity <'tis but a kiss I beg, Why art thou coy? — William Shakespeare>

    b : marked by cute, coquettish, or artful playfulness <usingcoy tricks to attract attention>

     2

 .  showing reluctance to make a definite commitment <a coyresponse>

I'm not gonna give tips to the fellas of yet. That'll come soon. Just know that SMALL TALK HEPS YOU TOO!!! SO PURSUE WHOMEVER YOU LIKE WITH SMALL TALK! 

Although I'm still learning how to get my game on I found that SMALL TALK really helps! If someone is interested in you, they usually try to get you to engage with some small talk.

Small Talk = Pointless conversation that enables your admirer or the one you are admiring open the door for further communication! That is the goal! Small talk is completely irrelevant and does not have to make sense at all. You can be like "Wow, what did you think about the Spurs VS. Miami Heat Game? Why is the sky blue? etc." The whole point is to get the other person to engage you in conversation. Small talk can then morph into something great. The both of you talk about the weather in Kansas and then discover that you both are big fans of Scandal! Then that sparks more conversation and you'll go with with somebodies phone number! YASSSSS!

Now if you are on the receptive end of things, meaning someone is pursuing you - engage them as they small talk you ONLY IF YOU ARE INTERESTED! See if your a ncie person like myself, you will give them settle ques that you aren't interested like texting on your phone, looking at someone else, or just simply telling them nicely, I AM NOT INTERESTED or make up some excuse like "Oh, I'm currently in a relationship and I'm not taking any applications or looking for interviewees."


Small Talk also allows the both of you to feel comfortable with one another. You know how it is when you first meet someone! Isn't it awkward? You may act all shy and weird the first few minutes. But Small talk diffuses that nervous energy because you gain familiarity with the other person. :)


So there you have it. Small talk is what we all do when we flirt rather you are the pursuer or the one being pursued. It is one  of the many keys for communication! Who knows, you may meet your future baby's father or mother! And I'm just as lost as you all are in the game of flirting but hey, we gotta learn somewhere right?


More of these flirty tips are coming!

Smooches!

Please share this post and your comments!

"I Don't Care if Your Gay, Just Don't Flaunt It!"

Living life as a gay male, I often get frustrated by the logic of some people. Some people embrace the "feminine" qualities within gay men and some despise it.

It really makes me want to run face first into a wall sometimes when I hear people say "it's ok that your gay but, why do you have to throw it in my face? Why do you have to flaunt it? Why can't you be gay but still act like a man?" 

Don't you understand that we are people? It's all expression. Gender expression, sexual expression, physical expression. Heterosexuals get to express themselves and their qualities/characteristics. So why can't we do the same? 

I don't view homosexuality as a lifestyle, it's a path of experience in my eyes. We all have different experiences that bring us challenges. 

The gender binary is so LOCKED! Meaning that "men are supposed to do this, and women are supposed to do that!" But where do we, as LGBT people, fall in the spectrum? 

Those comments, questions and judgements are not only appalling but very insensitive.  Many people have this perception that all gay men are feminine and act the same. So not true! There are masculine gay men, feminine gay men, and some who have a mixture of masc/fem qualities (Them Butch Queens yassssss!!)

And lets not other the hatred within in the gay community. As men, we thrive off of being as straight as possible. "Oh I'm straight acting! I'm a top! I'm this I'm that! I'm a real man! Come taste this machoness!" But it's not a debate about who is a real man, it's about being true to who you are! 

That is why I stand tall as a proud feminine gay male. I was taught that there was something wrong with me. But  I had to fight and continue to do so everyday to prove that I am who i am and that's ok. 

At the same token, I have had to understand that by me living my life, I am taking a risk yet opening the door for other LGBT people all over the world. In a patriarchal world where heterosexual men thrive, our lives are a political stance against the norm. So we have to stay strong and continue to open doors for one another because after racism, homophobia is another festering sickness  of the world. 

So if you are homosexual, be you and stay true to you! I'm trying to do the same! Furthering my understanding of who I am and were I got in this BIG world! Be safe, be wise, be careful. 

Share your comments and thoughts! 

Beyonce - "Standing on the Sun" Review

(World Renown Music Starlet) Beyonce's new promo single "Standing on the Sun" is a welcoming, fresh, sunny delight to the summer ahead of us. The song was created for her magnificent H&M campaign in which the commercial was released as a mini music video back in May! Recently, Beyonce debuted the summer hit in a performance on her Ms. Carter World Tour and the BeyHive went bananas! 

My take on it-

This song is pop royalty! I feel like this is a new and fresh sound for Beyonce, which is what I've been dying for. It is a much needed turn around from the heavy horns and drum use. The record was written by Sia, who also penned Rihanna's hit single "Diamonds" from Unapologetic. 

I've noticed that Sia's lyrics are very honest, romantic, earthy, and just everything! At first I felt like the song was meant for Rihanna but Beyonce made it hers! It fits her and I hope she allows it to be a single for her fifth album. Standing on the Sun just does something to you once it comes on. It's a sensual, laid back, and hypnotizing. 

So take a listen. Do you think "Standing on the Sun" should be Beyonce's new single? Will her fifth album be world shattering? TeamBeyonce are currently still deciding on what the official single, direction, and drive of her fifth album will be. I beleive team Beyonce jand Beyonce her self just wants to deliver this product as it is her debut album. She is taking her time, focusing on delivering the right meal to her fans! We can't wait Beyonce! 


Give me those thoughts of yours!! Please share!